SPEAKING IN SHADOWS: THE ART OF VERBAL AND NON-VERBAL UNHEALTHY PERSUASION

Written by: Himansika (2nd year) Department of Applied Psychology

Imagine sitting across someone nodding to whatever you have been saying. On the surface, their responses seem warm, yet you feel a sense of unease—as if you are being gently steered somewhere. Later, you realize the conversation was not what it appeared to be. Words shape what we say, but gestures, tone, and silence often shape what we feel—whether through a handshake, a smile, or the smallest shift in expression.

Communication is the foundation of all human interaction. It isn’t just an exchange of words, but how an individual shares ideas, feelings, and meanings. It is spoken, written, expressed in body language, tone,- what is said, and how it is said. Mismatch here—the bending of communication to serve another’s purpose—marks the boundary between an honest exchange and manipulation.

Communication crosses into manipulation when someone deliberately employs deception, exploitation, or dishonesty to sway others into acting against their own interests. According to the Cambridge dictionary, manipulation is “controlling someone or something to your own advantage, often unfairly or dishonestly.” Common tactics include gaslighting, guilt-tripping, and sowing confusion or self-doubt. These tactics exploit vulnerabilities, harming relationships and autonomy. It is often difficult for victims to recognize how they are being manipulated, since manipulators operate in subtle and undetectable ways.

An individual often encounters the concept of coercive persuasion in various areas, such as advertising and marketing, political discourse, and personal relationships. Such influence in such cases is conveyed through a variety of verbal and non-verbal cues.

MANEUVERING WITHIN PERSONAL DYNAMICS

Manipulation within our immediate circles can also be difficult to recognize. What if the person who professes love also violates your boundaries, undermines your confidence, and makes you feel responsible for everything? A text unanswered, a compliment turned backhanded, silence as punishment. These are the signals that emotional engineering is at work in the relationship—quiet, painful, and often overlooked.

Such unhealthy persuasion in personal relationships occurs when people use emotional tactics to gain control, influence decisions, or undermine the other’s sense of independence. Unlike healthy persuasion, which respects boundaries and mutual consent, manipulation operates covertly—often making the other person feel guilty, insecure, or dependent without even realizing it. Tactics such as gaslighting, guilt-tripping, love bombing, and withholding affection are commonly used to create confusion and emotional imbalance.

For instance, gaslighting makes a partner doubt their own memory or judgment. When held accountable, the person may insist, “I never said that, you must be imagining things,” even when the person is certain the conversation happened. Guilt-tripping often sounds like, “If you really loved me, you’d do this for me,” pushing someone to act out of obligation rather than choice. Similarly, a manipulator may withhold affection, becoming distant, silent, or cold—until their partner gives in to their demands.

Over time, these tactics lead to confusion, low self-esteem, and a loss of individuality. The manipulated person may begin questioning their worth, doubting their instincts, or feeling trapped. It is important to recognize these signs over time and set boundaries to protect oneself (Sritof, 2024).

MARKETING AND ADVERTISING

Being lied to by another person isn’t the only time when a person becomes a victim of unhealthy persuasion. Have you ever noticed how you buy that one decor item or those fancy shoes randomly? That feeling of not wanting to leave it because the deal is sweet and you had always needed them, even though you never knew it before now.

Advertising agencies craft catchy slogans, emotional language, and even cultural cues to make products more appealing. These tactics are not always straightforward persuasion—they can also border on manipulation. In marketing, the main aim is to swindle an individual into buying a product.

What makes this approach tricky is that it often appears harmless, even supportive, as though the brand genuinely has the customer’s best interests at heart. The pressure is often invisible. Many don’t realize they are being guided toward decisions they might not have made otherwise. For marketers, however, this is the essence of promotion—using advertising and publicity not just to present a product, but to frame it in such a way that buying it feels almost inevitable.

One form is deceitful advertising, where misleading facts are presented, either because they are untrue or because the key facts are hidden. For example, Patanjali

Ayurveda advertised its products, claiming they could cure chronic health issues. These claims were challenged under the Drugs & Magic Remedies Act and deemed misleading.

Exaggeration of quality, or “puffery,” refers to those hyperbolic claims a seller makes about how great a product is—claims so general or subjective that they can’t actually be proven or disproven. To take an instance, Ghadi’s campaign (Mahashaktishali formula with Shakti-booster granules) claimed that their detergent begins deep cleaning instantly, so that the consumer doesn’t need to soak clothes for half an hour. “Instant deep cleaning” is a strong quality claim, which may not be fully verifiable (how deep? Under what stain/condition?) It simplifies reality to promote the product’s superiority.

Emotive persuasion is another very common kind of manipulative advertising tactic, which appeals to the moral side of a consumer by either warning consumers of potential dangers or promising extraordinary outcomes, both of which are often doubtful at best. For example, TATA Tea’s “Jaago Re” campaign

urged people to wake up socially/politically, be more aware of corruption, inequality, etc., and purchase their products in the process, which unsurprisingly had nothing to do with the issue.

Tactics such as urgent “only three left!” alerts, emotionally charged slogans, reward programs, and targeted suggestions are all designed to encourage people to spend more than they might have intended. Elements like the big, bright “buy now” buttons, pop-ups, and personalized deals create a sense of urgency and excitement, making it harder to stop and think before clicking “purchase.” The lines between normal shopping habits and compulsive buying may start to blur, sometimes turning into what we now know as shopaholism.

How persuasion tactics fuel shopaholism

Studies indicate that tactics triggering emotional responses or cognitive overload can sap a person’s self-control, making impulsive shopping more likely. Those who struggle with low self-esteem, anxiety, or emotional stress are especially vulnerable to these manipulative cues (Baniashraf, et al., 2025).

A person may fall too deeply, and soon it becomes a burden, making not only personal life difficult, but also straining relationships. Compulsive shoppers may hide their purchases, run into financial trouble, or become preoccupied with shopping at the expense of spending quality time with loved ones. Money-related arguments and secrecy can erode trust, while the guilt or anxiety tied to shopping addiction can make individuals withdraw emotionally, straining friendships and family bonds.

All of the claim-types mentioned above are supported in advertising through verbal, visual, and auditory techniques—or by combining these—to craft messages that manipulate.

POLITICAL DISCOURSE

We live in a “post-truth” era, where emotions decide what is counted as a fact. Facts serve as a common foundation that allows diverse opinions to coexist, each shaped by different interests and emotions. To deny or obscure facts is to erode the very basis that supports democratic dialogue.

Political speeches no longer just ignore truth – they actively refuse to engage with opposing perspectives. And while terms such as “propaganda”, “fake news”, and “post-truth” may feel like modern buzzwords, lying and manipulation have always been part of politics- even if they weren’t always as obvious a threat to democracy as they are now. Politicians have long given stirring speeches, offered incentives, shaped decision-making behind the scenes, and hidden or distorted facts. Hitler’s propaganda apparatus is a classic example of how media control can be used for coercive persuasion. By using radios and public speakers, the Nazis spread propaganda widely, while strict censorship silenced opposing views.

Misinformation through the media remains a powerful tool for political manipulation, which is now easier than ever due to technological advancements. Recognizing deception has also become harder: a well-chosen euphemism or strategic ambiguity may be subtle, yet among the most effective techniques.

Emotional And Behavioural Impacts On Individuals

At its core, political persuasion plays on human emotions-fear, hope, anger- drowning out facts with feelings. When fear rises, critical thinking fades, and people often follow narratives that promise safety or justice, even if those promises come wrapped in half-truths or misleading claims. On a broader scale, political manipulation fractures societies by creating “us v/s them” mentalities. It drives people to pick sides so sharply that compromise becomes impossible. This emotional steering doesn’t just impact voting booths; it infiltrates daily life by creating an environment where suspicion and hostility become the new normal, where neighbors turn into adversaries, and open conversations are shot down. The ability to judge the truth for oneself is handed over to the media bubbles that reinforce what one already believes. The modern political landscape directs attention not to facts, but sowing confusion and stifling discussions.

This shift from outside influences to personal patterns highlights how deeply manipulation can affect not only public and private spheres but also the very core of personality and relationship dynamics. In cluster B disorders, manipulation may appear as charm, deception, emotional blackmail, or dramatic behavior—sometimes as a deliberate tool, other times as a desperate coping strategy.

COERCIVE PERSUASION AS A CENTRAL TRAIT IN “CLUSTER B” PERSONALITY DISORDERS

Cluster B personality disorders—Antisocial, Borderline, Narcissistic, and Histrionic—share dramatic, emotionally charged patterns of behavior. While distinct in presentation of symptoms, manipulation often surfaces as a central mechanism, serving different purposes depending on the disorder.

Antisocial Personality Disorder (ASPD)

Antisocial personality disorder is characterized by a pervasive disregard for and violation of the rights of others. Individuals often show impulsivity, lack of remorse, failure to conform to rules, deceitfulness (lying, conning, use of aliases), and more.

For individuals with ASPD, manipulation is often cold and calculated. The aim is to gain advantage—money, power, or anything else. Charm, deception, and intimidation become tools to control others, with little or no concern for the harm inflicted. Here, manipulation functions primarily as exploitation.

For example, lying to get others to do their job, feigning relationships, and using superficial charm to flatter those who can benefit them.

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

BPD is marked by instability in relationships, self-image, and emotions, along with an intense fear of abandonment. Interpersonal interactions are often volatile and intense, leading to identity disturbance and impulsive behaviors, recurrent self-harming, or suicidal gestures.

In BPD, manipulation is often emotional and reactive rather than calculated. Threats of self-harm, emotional outbursts, or sudden shifts in perception of others may function as manipulative behaviors, even if unconsciously deployed. Tactics like guilt tripping are very common.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Narcissistic personality disorder involves grandiosity and a constant need for admiration. Individuals often maintain an inflated sense of importance and expect special treatment. Manipulation here serves to gain superiority and control. Gaslighting, belittling, and exploiting others are ways to maintain the narcissist’s fragile self-image.

Histrionic Personality Disorder

Histrionic personality disorder is characterized by excessive emotionality and constant attention-seeking via dramatic, provocative behaviors. Dramatization, exaggeration, or seduction are used as weapons to captivate the other, not necessarily maliciously, but to secure attention and reassurance. For instance, crying to their partner that they are the only person they trust whenever the partner tries to maintain boundaries.

It is to be noted that any of the signs discussed aren’t absolute alone at once. Several factors, like time, frequency, conditions, etc., are to be noted before making any assumptions.

CONCLUSION

Manipulation—whether in marketing, politics, or personal relationships—has become a quiet force shaping our beliefs, behaviours, and connections. Messages today are rarely neutral; they’re about steering perceptions, obscuring clarity, and sometimes dismantling shared truths. The danger lies not only in what is being said, but in what is withheld, distorted, or disguised as the truth. Ultimately, this pattern of unhealthy persuasion erodes trust, corrodes relationships, and undermines the foundations of society. The cost of ignoring is high—but awareness can help resist its pull.

REFERENCES

● Baniashraf, F., Madineshat, M., Ayubi, E., & Sadeghian, E. (2025). The relationship between compulsive shopping behavior, family functioning, and fashion orientation among female students: a descriptive cross-sectional correlational study. BMC psychology. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC12358063/

● Butts, R. (2024). Psychological manipulation. EBSCO Research Starters. https://www.ebsco.com/research-starters/health-and-medicine/psychological-manipulation

● Champawat, K. (2024). Why and How Do Leaders Manipulate Truth?: Post-truth politics distorts truth, erodes trust, and poses a threat to democracy. Foreign Analysis. https://foreignanalysis.com/why-and-how-do-leaders-manipulate-truth/

● Danciu, V. (2014). Manipulative marketing: Persuasion and manipulation of the consumer through advertising. Journal of Theoretical and Applied Economics, 21(2), 19-34. https://store.ectap.ro/articole/951.pdf

● Dowding, K., & Oprea, A. (2024). Manipulation in politics and public policy. Economics and Philosophy. https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/economics-and-philosophy/article/manipulation-in-politics-and-public-policy/1C6109A40D8038276F48987A637BF57E

● Ismail, S.K. (2013). Manipulation of Meaning in Political Discourse. Midad ALAdab Refereed Quarterly Journal 7(1). https://digitalcommons.aaru.edu.jo/midad/vol7/iss1/17/

● Rangaswami, E., et al. (2021). Manipulation Tactics and Consumer Behaviour: Creating a Desire to Purchase. Journal of Tianjin University Science and Technology, 54(10). DOI 10.17605/OSF.IO/BKHXM https://tianjindaxuexuebao.com/dashboard/uploads/1.%20BKHXM.pdf

● Sritof, S. (2024). 7 Signs You're Being Emotionally Manipulated in Your Relationship: Plus how to respond. VeryWellMind. https://www.verywellmind.com/manipulation-in-marriage-2302245

Written by :

Himansika

Edited by :

Charu Gupta (Senior Editor )

Koena Gulabani (Senior Editor)