Sex, Gender and Pronouns - A guide to an Inclusive Society

“Language and vocabulary modification have the power to transform mindsets.”

LGBTQIAPK+ community has been grappling with adversities since the conception of history. Often humiliated and excluded from society, they have always been denied access to even basic facilities and human rights. The major reason behind this exclusion can be found deep down in the roots of the kind of language we use to communicate with them. The concept of hetero-normativity has been ruling over the mindsets of the people. Any person that “stands out” is often made to feel that they don’t belong to society. The use of gender-biased language and lack of knowledge has also escalated this problem.

Nowadays, we observe many people using terms like she/her, he/him, they/them, etc. on their social media profiles, or while introducing themselves. A lot of us question this or probably don’t understand the reason behind the usage of these pronouns. These days, sitting at home, we see many new Instagram trends that we might feel the pressure to follow and post, but this is no such trend, it is something we must all respect, and understand the impact and the weight it carries.

THE IMPORTANCE OF PRONOUNS

Let us begin by telling you that these are called ‘pronouns’- the words we use to refer to someone, without saying their name. They formally refer to a small set of words (such as I, she, he, you, it, we, or they) in a language that are used as substitutes for nouns or noun phrases and whose referents are named or understood in the context. It is how someone would like to be identified and addressed.

SEX, GENDER, AND SEXUAL PREFERENCES

AFAB or AMAB- refers to assigned female/male at birth. These terms are assigned based on the biological functioning of an individual. There is a huge difference between gender and sex even though, people often use them interchangeably. To simplify this concept, we can infer that sex is what’s between our legs, and is judged by our genitals and Gender is what’s between our ears, that is what we identify ourselves as. Sexual orientation is another term, it describes our sexual preferences.

Now that we have a basic understanding of what each of these terms means, let us understand why pronouns are imperative. It is necessary to see people for who they believe themselves to be, not as we think or perceive they ‘should’ be. Pronouns can describe an integral part of who we are and the flexibility of their usage avoids assumptions about one’s pronouns and eventually their gender identity based on their appearance and expression. Using pronouns sensitively is a way of affirming an individual’s identity, which is a major step towards being inclusive. The binary gender system is a limited handwritten belief system. Some people associate themselves with particular pronouns and some choose to go with no pronouns at all. We should respect that as well, everything is valid as long as the person is accepting and comfortable with it. Some people will choose to have multiple pronouns, in this case, using both of them can help us. This is because we do not want the person feeling that we disregard their gender identity/expression.

HOW TO USE GENDER-NEUTRAL PRONOUNS

Using someone’s preferred pronouns is just mindfulness, and it is not optional. It is required to do so! Language is changeable and ever-evolving, let us learn how to use gender-neutral pronouns with the help of some examples:

For the people who prefer she/her-

Laura is wearing a coat, that is HER coat, SHE loves it.

For people who prefer they/them-

Billy is wearing a coat. that is THEIR coat, THEY love their coat.

If someone has multiple pronouns like she/they-

She is wearing her coat, That is their coat, THEY love it. Pronouns are part of how someone experiences themselves, you do not have to understand their identity to respect their pronouns.

HOW TO NORMALISE AND BE SENSITIVE TO A PERSON’S PRONOUNS: SOME GROUND RULES

1. When discussing someone’s past, use their current pronouns. Transgender and gender-diverse individuals do not want to be reminded of their past selves.

2. We can ask someone about what pronouns they would like to be addressed by until they tell us, it is wise to use “THEY” to talk about them.

3. Can we ask someone their pronouns? ABSOLUTELY! (And be sure to use them as well.

4. Use multiple pronouns interchangeably.

5. If you make a mistake, correct yourself, even if they do not say anything. If they do point it out, avoid attention to the mistake, apologize once, correct yourself and move on.

6. Ask them if they are comfortable with you sharing their new pronouns with others. If they are, do make it a point to correct others when they use the wrong pronouns while addressing that person.

7. It might be difficult for some, more so, for some, you need to show your support and respect to them.

8. Even if you have not changed your pronouns, you must use them and specify yours, for example, “Hi! My name is Khushi, and my pronouns are she/her.”

Let’s explore beyond the binary gender spectrum, it’s important to see that there aren’t just two genders, it’s the need of the hour to understand their status in our country to move towards a more inclusive society.

LGBTQIA+ community in India

The first pride parade in India was held in Kolkata on 2nd June 1999. That day only 15 people participated and it was called the ‘Kolkata Rainbow Pride Walk.’ Presently, the pride parade happens in 21 countries all over the country. It has been an arduous path of survival for the LGBTQIA+ community.

On 6 September 2018, the Supreme Court ruled Section 377 as unconstitutional. Following the defeat of this draconian law, talks about the rights and sufferings of the LGBTQ+ community have risen. There are a few articles in the constitution that protect the rights of the community like Article 14 which treats them equally as any other citizen and Article 19 which provides the freedom of speech and expression. Article 15 of the constitution prohibits discrimination on grounds of religion, race, caste, sex, or place of birth. However, Article 15 is only restricted to discrimination from the state and government bodies. No legislative law has been enacted that directly protects the members of the LGBTQIA+ community from the unrestricted discrimination they are subjected to.

Nevertheless, there have been small steps taken to curb the discrimination against the community. In February 2021, the Allahabad High Court ruled that firing and discriminating against any individual on the premise of sexual orientation is a violation of Navtej Singh Johar v. Union of Republic of India Supreme Court judgment.

The Transgender Persons (Protection of Rights) Act was adopted in 2019 in an attempt to curb discrimination.

In 2021, Tamil Nadu became the first state to ban conversion therapy and Madras High Court Justice N. Anand conveyed his views, “Ignorance is no justification for normalizing any kind of discrimination.”

While steps are being taken to check the discrimination, India still falls behind in providing basic rights such as marriage and adoption to the LGBTQIA+ community.

The Progress… (LGBTQIA+ community)

LGBTQ+ activists have been fighting for decades and have come so far. Starting from the Stonewall riots, this movement has spread all over the world. Every day a myriad of people is working towards spreading awareness and fighting for the rights of LGBTQ+ rights.

As of January 2021, same-sex marriages have been recognized in 29 countries. Pride parades that started in New York are held all over the world now.

On June 28, 1970, people took to the streets in New York to commemorate the first anniversary of the Stonewall Riots. This event was called The Christopher Street Liberation Day and is considered the first-ever pride parade. In 1978, Gilbert Baker designed and stitched the first-ever rainbow flag to develop a symbol of pride and hope for the LGBTQ+ community. U.S. legalized same-sex marriages in 2015 and currently even has active laws that protect the LGBTQ+ community.

The Asian nations fell behind in terms of progress for the LGBTQ+ community in the 20th century. With the advent of change in Asia, many countries have slowly started showing support. Taiwan became the first Asian country to give marriage rights to the LGBTQ+ community. Israel and Taiwan even provide a wider range of rights for protection. Although a lot of countries have legalized homosexuality, it is still socially unacceptable. Lack of awareness and education has led to this situation where the LGBTQ+ people have to put up with blatant discrimination and have little to no rights to protect themselves in Asian nations.

Many LGBTQ+ people, activists, supporters are putting effort day by day to fight for their rights as human beings who can be free to love whoever they want without discrimination or risking their safety.

“Openness may not completely disarm prejudice but it is a good place to start.”

Jason Collins, First openly gay player in the NBA.

Moving Forward

The ball of change has started rolling and it won’t stop until it has reached its goal. The world is constantly changing. While many choose to grow and move forward, some choose to cling to the glories of their past. The strict ideals of heterosexuality can no longer dictate. The people need to educate themselves and shed their ignorant beliefs so that there can be a future where no one will ever have to apologize for who they love and live in this world without fear. This world will change someday and become a place where everyone is free to love whoever they want.

Introduction of pronouns should be something as common as stating your name! we can criticize the fact that till now, people were neglecting all of this and were stuck to the binary gender spectrum, but it is better to move on and be the change, it is up to us to make a change, this pride month, let us take a pledge to normalize using pronouns, IT IS NOT HARD TO TREAT PEOPLE LIKE HUMAN BEINGS!

Written By:

Khushi Bajaj (2nd Year)

Santushti Anand (1st Year)

Reviewed By:

Aasis Sethi

Manvi Mehrotra